Now go microwave your bagel. And don't burn the place down. Disclaimer: This is a work of satire. No Elizas or Steves from Accounting were harmed in the making of this blog post. But honestly? We’ve all been her.
While Eliza was defending her tardiness, the fire alarm went off. Apparently, someone in the breakroom did move the microwave, and they set a popcorn bag on fire. As the entire office evacuated, Eliza grabbed the fire extinguisher, put out the small blaze, saved the office pet hamster (Mr. Whiskers), and then looked Steve dead in the eye. eliza ibarra late for work
But for Eliza Ibarra, last Tuesday wasn't just a bad morning. It was a masterclass in chaos. Now go microwave your bagel
She then produced a crumpled bagel from her purse, took a bite, and asked Steve from Accounting, "Did you move the microwave again? Because I refuse to eat a cold bagel while discussing Q3 projections." No Elizas or Steves from Accounting were harmed
What happened next is why the internet has lost its collective mind. Witnesses say Eliza didn’t tiptoe in quietly. She owned the entrance. Her hair was in a messy bun that looked suspiciously like last night’s ponytail. She was clutching a to-go bag that was actively leaking maple syrup onto the carpet. Yet, she had the swagger of a CEO arriving early.